Is Bedtime Scrolling the New Me-Time? A Mum’s Honest Story

I won’t lie. It’s definitely something to look forward to. That moment when both are peacefully asleep.

All day I’ve been slaving away. Food made. Food on the floor. Hoodie fabric not soft enough. Pooped again literally 3 seconds after the diaper was changed. Laundry basket overflowing. Cups, glasses, stains everywhere. Sometimes I feel like throwing everything out the window. But whatever. I met every need. It was a good day.

And if I don’t fall asleep when they fall asleep, I’m going to reward myself with some good old me-time. So I thought.

How does it look in reality?

Will I have a nice bath, lie back, listen to some music?
Will I pick up a book and drink a nice cup of tea?
Should I be productive and tidy up after the mess they made all day?

Naahhh.

There is a much quicker solution here.

My hand grabs my phone. Don’t even have to think about it. Finger tips on the screen. Smooth flow. Clicky-di-click.

First stop. YouTube. My favourite "news channel". Because it sensationalises everything. At least then it feels like I’m watching a movie.

Then. Twitter. And I stop after a while because I can literally feel the anxiety rising. My head cinema starts. And the feed keeps showing me more and more horrifying stories, especially stories about kids. The unimaginable. The stuff you can’t unsee. And even when I try not to look, it’s so in your face.

Eventually I’ve had enough, so I switch to Instagram. Click on one thing and suddenly the whole feed is the same thing.

Then back to YouTube. Because maybe there are spoilers on the next Outlander episode. (Yes, I know. I’m that person.)

And then it’s midnight. Shit. I have to get up at 5am with the girls.

My head feels baked. That was not fun. That was not relaxing. Not enjoyable. Just exhausting. Like my brain is a battery that overheated and is about to explode. And I’m lying there thinking, why the hell did I do this AGAIN?

My me-time, that little precious time in the evening, has turned into compulsive clicking, checking, and mainly scrolling. And some involuntary doomscrolling too. Scrolling my life away. Mainly in bed because I still want to keep an eye on the kids. Bed rotting. Every night.

And if they released a whole season of Outlander at once? I swear I’d stay up till morning and binge watch the whole thing. Feeling like I got to do this. Considering this as “living”. And then suffer through the next day like I’m hungover.

How is any of this normal?

And it’s not just at night. If I try to work and concentrate, the second I come across a problem, something that needs some brain power, I catch myself escaping. Instagram. WhatsApp. “Just check this quickly.” As if it’s a break. When I know I’m just overwhelmed.

And I don’t like it.

I hate it the same way I hate being in a room full of people staring at their phones. Or trying to talk to someone who is half listening, scrolling, throwing nonsense answers at you. I could literally get physical when someone repeats the same sentence 4-5 times because they can’t finish it in one go. Their attention is still on the screen. Like WTF?

Why do we do this?
Why do we escape the real world on purpose?
Why do we think we reward ourselves when we give ourselves up in this manner?
Why do we subscribe to this alternative reality?

Which it actually is.

A different reality. It’s getting harder and harder to tell what’s real and what isn’t. Not only because of AI, but because everything is so overly dramatic. One day it’s a conspiracy theory, the next day it’s common knowledge. It’s all too crazy.

And why it really, really worries me?

Because I know subconsciously all this information is stored. Like one big trash bin of spam and scam and doomsday material I carry every day in the back of my head. Only I don’t know where the delete button is in there.

Blank slate, please.

And the part that blows my mind

While I try to convince myself I didn’t waste any time, or only a little. Since everyone is sleeping already. No one needed me… so why not?!

But when you do the maths on how much you spend scrolling?

I kid you not, it's a part-time job.

Data Source Statista 

Bedtime Scrolling: the unpaid part-time job you never applied for

What bedtime scrolling does to your brain (and why its worse when you're postpartum)

Scrolling isn’t “addictive” for no reason. Those little info nuggets are designed to catch your attention, especially the emotional stuff is triggering. So instead of sliding into calm-mode before sleep, your system flips into alert mode. That’s why you can feel so mentally “baked” after another infinite scroll.

Not relaxed. Not restored. Just… fried.

Think of it like this:

When you’re teaching your kid to swim, you’re constantly on watch. Or when they’re on the bike and you’re half-running beside them, supporting the balance, scanning for cars, ready to catch them if they wobble.

You know how tired you are after that, right?
Because being on high alert is exhausting.
So even if scrolling looks harmless, it can be exhausting for your mind.

And postpartum? Your brain changes when you become a mother for a good reason: to keep your baby safe.

So your baseline is already more “on-alert.”

You know that feeling when someone else’s baby cries “mama” in a shopping centre and your whole system jumps even though it’s not your kid?

That’s your alarm system being triggered.

Now imagine feeding that alarm system every single night right before sleep.

No wonder you don’t wake up feeling good the next morning.

No wonder everything feels harder to master: more worry, less resilience and less patience (with the kids, yourself, or your partner).

Here are some interesting studies on this topic.

• Being on your smartphone just before bedtime is linked with higher anxiety. (2025)
• Doomscrolling is a compulsive habit linked with higher anxiety, more depressive symptoms, more stress, and less resilience. (2025)
• Smartphone addiction and compulsive checking is linked with more aggression, including anger and hostility. (2021)

Postpartum Depression and Social Media: is there a connection?

I want to end this post with something to contemplate.

Let’s talk for a minute about postpartum depression. Something others get, and you don’t believe you can get… until you get it.

And it’s also not that uncommon for it to not show up straight after birth. It can hit months later when exhaustion finally reaches max. But anyway, not getting too much off track, what I wanted to show you is this:

I found a pretty interesting study comparing postpartum depression rates from 2010 to 2021, showing it went from roughly 9% to 19%.

That is not nothing. That’s a significant increase. So my brain immediately went: what happened around 2010 that could’ve kickstarted that acceleration?

Hm… guess what.
Instagram launched.
Later came TikTok.

Then 2020: the pandemic hit and being stuck at home made media consumption worse for so many of us, triggering health anxiety even in people who used to be totally chill.

I’m not saying this proves anything. It’s just an observation. Maybe there’s a link.

A quick note (because it’s not all bad)

I don’t want to paint social media or phone use in an entirely bad light. There is good that can come from it. I’ve personally made new friends through shared interests.

A literature review looking at social media use and postpartum depression basically lands on: it can be good (peer support, feeling seen and understood) and it can be bad (misinformation, social comparison, idealised motherhood).

It depends on how it’s used… and mostly what content you’re being exposed to. With that said, I hope you found this one helpful 🙂

❤️ Educational content only. Not medical advice.